How To Help Your Friend Facing An Unwanted Pregnancy

Not every pregnancy is unwanted, some are just unplanned. With that said, no matter the circumstances, the most important thing you can do is just listen. Listen to their fears, their thoughts, their wants, and in some cases, their excitement.  

Your friend is coming to you because they trust you. You don’t want to break that trust by pushing your thoughts and opinions on to the friend in need. Wait for them to ask for your advice.  

When I was in my 20’s I was faced with an unplanned pregnancy and placed my child for adoption because for my circumstances, it was best for the baby. Fast forward 20 some years, and someone very close to me found out she was pregnant. She wasn’t married yet but was dating an incredible guy who was there to support her. The issue she faced was how to tell her parents. Like me, she grew up in a very Christian home and wasn’t sure how her parents were going to react. She just needed someone to listen that had been through the same thing.  

I didn’t tell her what she had to do. I didn’t tell her that the way I did things was the right way to do it. All I wanted, as any friend should, was what was right for her and her circumstances. I wanted her to be happy, healthy, and feel like she could come to me for anything. I wanted her to feel how much I love her and how much I didn’t judge her.  

Now, she is just that! Happy, healthy, loved very much and the proud mom to two adorable little boys.  

As I said before, I placed my child for adoption. No baby shower for me. What I did get, thanks to my friends and family, was a “Blessings Shower.”  

Instead of baby gear for gifts, they all gave me gifts of things I would need in the hospital when I gave birth. Things like a bathrobe, notebook, crossword puzzles, etc.  

To see how much my friends cared was amazing. Little acts of kindness, no judgment, a shoulder to cry on, an ear to listen, and their unwavering friendship.  Those are the only things I needed.